Ok, still haven't found the issue but I did some trouble shooting.
When you hit the switch to 4wd you can hear/feel the relay clicking in the "under hood" fuse block. I did try again to swap the relays around (high beam relay is the same as the two 4WD relays) but no change. High beams work with any of the three relays so guessing the relays are good.
I pulled off the actuator on the front diff and had my son switch to 4WD mode while I watched it. I didn't observe any movement in the actuator at all. The actuator is way different from the one in the picture int his thread. It looked like just a spring.
Inside the diff there was a "pin" that looks like the actuator would move in and out of the diff to enable the 4wd I guess? I could move it a little bit but not push it all the way in or anything. Not sure if it is supposed to be pushed all the way in either?
Anyways, with the actuator unhooked, when I swap to 4WD mode the dash display blinks all 4 wheels like it's trying to shift to 4WD but obviously can't.
When I put the actuator back on, and swap to 4WD, the display of the wheels on the dash just goes away again.
Very odd. I've been unable to find any YT videos or anything on this 2nd gen 400 4WD set up.
Anyone have or know where I can get a service manual or anything like that?
Thanks